alias boxer: Do you ever run into conflict with others because of your "dog knowledge"?
I know it's got to happen with others besides myself. Either with friends, family, or new acquaintances... do you ever get into conversations about dogs and end up sharing knowledge or giving sincere advice that offends the other person? Ever talked to someone about something dog-related, where you just had to keep your mouth shut in order to keep the conversation polite, or when you just plain can't hold your tongue? Please share with me because I'd hate to be the only one that goes through this!
For instance, my mom has a 1 yr old "maltepoo" (whom she rescued, thank goodness) who barks at EVERYTHING. When this first started, I offered to help her with training, told her how to handle the barking, printed out articles from the internet that covered this topic... I felt like she refused to listen to me. One suggestion I made was to use a squirt bottle of water on the dog when she barked too much. My mom acted like it was cruel to get her wet all the time. A week later she bought the dog a shock collar (which she has never used, thank God). ???? Electric shock is more humane than a spray of water???? I just don't get it.
A month ago I ran into a lady with a 1 yr old lab mix from a shelter. She told me that the dog was being fed "expensive food" (Science Diet) when she got it as a puppy, so she continues to buy that for her, and THAT is what keeps her coat so shiny. I kept my mouth shut for that one.
Just an hour ago I met someone at a friend's house who is looking to breed his 2 yr old English Bulldog b*tch. This came up as I was telling everyone about my new puppy-sitting job with a 14-wk-old English Bulldog pup (male). When he said he had a female for breeding, I told him that the puppy I'm caring for is deaf. He said "So?" I said "It's genetic." He said, "Who cares?" So we got into it, and he ended up walking away from me without a word. What would you have done?
Thanks everyone for your replies.
I have learned, after many heated arguments with loved ones, that it's best to keep my mouth shut. I've gotten into it with BF, my parents, my extended family, friends.... and finally given up. My mom's "maltepoo" still drives her absolutely insane (I actually just gave her the "OK" on a new collar that vibrates instead of shocks, just to avoid a fight) and my BF is finally soaking in the reality of my "cancer trip" (when recently I did a lot or research on cancer in dogs after finding out that Caney is genetically predisposed to hemangiosarcoma). A few months ago when I was reading about cancer and sharing with BF and the roommate, they thought I was nuts. Two days ago Creek was diagnosed with a MCT. Wasn't so crazy after all, was I??
As for the guy tonight -- I explained to him how hard bulldogs are to breed, often requiring artificial insemination and C-sections. He said that "not all of them need that." ?? OK I said, that's true, not all of them need that. BUT it's still risky. Then I asked him if he loved his dog. He said "yes." I told him that breeding her would risk her life, and that breeding should be done out of love for the breed, NOT love for ones dog. Then I went on about my boxers, how wonderful and beautiful they are, and how I STILL would never put them through that (because I love them, because they haven't been health tested or shown, etc). THAT is when he walked away, claiming that he had also done research that I had done, but still disagreed with what I was saying.
One last thing -- his main reason for breeding her was because his family wanted a puppy from her. UGH.
Answers and Views:
Answer by Wheaten Mom
If they ask, I'll answer.
Otherwise, it's like kids, no one wants to listen to advice.
I would have had a hard time with the breeding question- I mean for gosh sakes he's putting his own dog at risk. (not even to mention the genetics of the thing!)
Know better? Give your own answer to this question!
Comments ( 21 )
Yes sometimes i get the cold shoulder from my friends or family because they think i'm a know it all. I'm just trying to help. So thanks for bringing it up. I too have learned when it comes to my family and Friends i keep my mouth zipped. Cheers
•Poppy• Wa says
Most recently, it was an argument over Christmas puppies. This girl (whom I do *not* like–but that's another story) got a puppy for Christmas; and her one of her friends got one last year for Christmas. This year's girl's pup came from the parents (she also got a kitten), last year it was a boyfriend gift (which have become VERY popular around here).
*Everyone* I seem to tell that Christmas puppies are a bad idea is baffled. No one understands *why*–even after I say how THAT is how puppies end up in shelters.
I was recently talking to my friend (who was fostering out a Boxer mix). She almost got the pup adopted by an older couple whose children had recieved a Boxer puppy for Christmas, and they thought it was too cute–reason they didn't want this dog? "Too big".
But even that friend ^^ didn't get the Christmas puppies idea. Her response when I said it to her "my dog was a Christmas gift". Though it was totally different–they adopted around Christmas time, and she picked it out. But still; I wasn't expecting *that* response from her (she's very shelter-active.)
OMG YES! My family! I hate to say this because I love my family, but they should NOT be pet owners! They don't take their dogs to the vet until it's too late or the problem has caused secondary problems.
It is SO frustrating because they will call me and say that I know about dogs and ask for advice. When I tell them the possibilities of the problem or to please take the dog to the vet, they get mad at me and tell me that I don't know what I'm talking about and I am "vet happy". As a matter of fact, by dad is so concerned that I take my dogs to the vet too often and unnecessarily that he is considering leaving me out of his will because he thinks the first thing I will do is "waste money at the vets office"! A couple of years ago one of my Poms went lame and couldn't walk. I rushed her to the vet immediately. She had a swollen disk in her back. I ask you….was that an unnecessary trip to the vet??? I THINK NOT!!!!! My Poms need regular dental cleanings. Unnecessary vet visit??? I THINK NOT!!!!
Let me tell you this – my dads dog had a mass jetting out of her neck. I told him to take her in to the vet and have it looked at. He refused and the mass became so big that it interfered with her breathing (spread to her lungs) and it also spread to her jaw and she was not able to open her mouth to eat. At the same time she had problems with her leg and she went lame. He once again refused to get her vet care until it was TOO LATE. He had to put her down last November. Now, I ask you…..would that be unnecessary vet visits??? I THINK NOT!!!!!!!!
One of my brothers dogs had something wrong with her eye. It because watery and she couldn't open it. I told him to take his dog to the vet. He let it go for several months and didn't get better. He finally took her in. It turns out that she had injured her cornea and it got infected. Now she is blind in that eye because of late vet treatment. Is that an unnecessary visit to the vet??? I THINK NOT!!!!!!
I don't understand why the HELL they call me and ask for advice and not take it? My dad overfed his dog and not only that, he fed her all of the things that she shouldn't have; chocolate, onions, grapes, raisins, etc. When I told him those are toxic to her, he rolled his eyes and said "Sadie can have anything she wants". (he was giving her chocolate ice cream at that exact moment) My brother is so concerned about his dogs becoming overweight that he doesn't feed his dogs enough – his dogs are underweight by about 10 pounds.
And don't even get me started on the Ol' Roy dog food my family feeds their dogs! Another thing they think I "waste" money on is the kibble I feed my dogs. They don't understand why I don't buy Ol' Roy when I can get a #50 bag for the same price I pay for an #8 bag of Wellness. I explain to them about the ingredients and nutrition, but they don't believe me even though the ingredients are on the back of the package! I have printed out many articles about the nutrition facts, but it goes right in the trash.
It's pointless to say anything to them anymore – it just falls on deaf ears.